A Sad Case of Over-Nuggetry

In the past few weeks, ABC has begun airing a show called "Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution," and I've gotta say, it's a pretty solid hour. It really touches on something I've been increasingly finding at once both liberating and frustrating, and something that is going to play a huge role in American life in years to come. It all really comes down to the issue of an over reliance on heavily processed and pre-packaged food and an jarring rejection of anything resembling actual cooking.

Hearing that the show was to be set in West Virginia, I had to assume that the problem was that the locals were overdoing their possum stew and raccoon meat. Unfortunately, this all came down to just a matter of the locals devouring frozen pizzas and chicken fingers like they were breath mints and having coronaries at age 46.

The cast of characters reads about the way you'd guess, and while it borders on being a little predictable, they all seem to fit together pretty well. We focus have our struggling hero Oliver, a likable and earnest figure trying to make sense of all the deranged opposition. Among the most notable opponents are a surly radio host working to maximize his prick quotient at every opportunity and school administrators puzzled at what possibly could be wrong. It's amazing with the school crew, as they somehow manage to be both ambivalent as to what's happening and yet protective of the status quo. It's the equivalent of a 2006 New Orleans noting that there was a little bit of a water issue, but not a big deal. And who doesn't like swimming, right?

Most acutely serving as the primary villain, Oliver and the viewer are confronted by a lunch lady appearing to be the twangy offspring of a "Lord of the Rings" orc and Nurse Ratched. She's hellbent on tossing deep fried frozen crap into the oven and responds to most of Oliver's requests as though he's asking to wipe her hair net on his balls. Most troubling was her admission that she only had become a school cook for the money (wow, didn't see that one coming. Move over hedge fund managers, you've now got rivals in the yacht market). I'm still weighing whether this is more an indictment of the school or her, but either way she makes a hell of an antagonist. While ABC needs to make sure they don't get too heavy handed with her, but I actually fear they may have some corny turnaround and they all become friends over broccoli and apple slices.

But we're not there yet, and far from it. It's clear from both the show and life in general that most kids would eat their parents and the family dog if they came as a nugget with barbecue sauce. But that being said, blaming an 8 year old for food choices is the same as blaming a raccoon for raiding the trash or The Situation from tanning too much (damn I miss that show). It's ultimately the responsibility of the school and parents, and in the case of this West Virginia disaster, they seem to be in a contest to be the most inept.

The turning point we're working toward is the gradual transition to actually making kids and families understand the enormous importance of knowing what they're eating and the actual simplicity and savings of just taking responsibility for what happens at the table. It drives me CRAZY when people piss and moan about being too busy to actually make something decent and having to rely on this pre-made crap. Here are 2 facts: (1) it's cheaper than people think; and (2) most of these people have enough time to do something totally reasonable. Don't get me wrong, I'm not talking quail eggs and filet mignon with creme brulee. I'm talking crock pots, pasta, and frozen vegetables. I know some people are really busy, I really do. I grew up in one of those households and I get it. That being said, no one can convince me that there's enough time to throw some frozen peas in a pot for 8 minutes. If people can find an hour to watch bad singers on American Idol, they can throw dollar a pound chicken into the oven.

That's the part of the show I like most, overall. The stuff Oliver's pushing is, at its heart, easy and filling stuff that isn't what people think of under the title "Food Revolution." It's just a matter of making spaghetti for 4 people in about 20 minutes as opposed to baking a frozen pizza in the same amount of time. Hell, make the damn pizza yourself and you're still ahead of the game (it's much easier than you'd think and tastes like the $20 bistro stuff). Admittedly, I drive the wife crazy with running the grocery bills on dinner and exclaiming "this all cost $5.50 for the whole meal and we'll eat it again tomorrow!" But at the end of the day the point's completely valid, and that's the underlying fact that needs to be driven home: you can eat better and cheaper if you open your eyes and just think about what you're doing.

The trouble here is getting that point across to the enormous segment of the population that is so reluctant to buy into this idea. In a lot of ways, the focus really has to be on the younger generations in school now, and on trying to promote the idea that most of your meals shouldn't come from a cartoon character. I love that he's trying to teach some basic skills, and that's where the gains are going to be made. It's a waste of time just banging the anti-KFC drum without offering up something as an alternative that people can throw together fast and cheap.

Of course it's a little tricky because the people selling all that shit as real food are making big money off of fat third graders. Do you think Sysco (they did all my school lunch food growing up) is excited to lose any of their $36 Billion in annual revenue? Oh Helllllllls no. Of course they're lobbying for all these crazy administrative rules that confuse what can be served. It's easy to rip on Mickey Dee's for what they're pulling, but there's no excuse for school administrators to completely whore out students for food suppliers when they can do it themselves with some decent planning and some sweat. Hey, I love me some lunch ladies and if they can hack it, then I say great. But do you think it's odd that the makeup of restaurant cooks is completely different than what you'll see in every school in America? If we need to reshape the whole system, so be it. There are omlettes to be made, and in the end there may be no way to avoid some broken eggs.

So to wrap it up, check out the Oliver show on Friday nights and start paying attention to ways we can promote a little more self-reliance on what we eat. I'm sure there's a term for this already, and I'm obviously not making up new concepts here (I'll leave the exact phrasing for the better foodies than myself). But we have to be cognizant in the end of what's happening in our schools and the ways that public policy decisions directly impact health patterns leading into years ahead.

And if that doesn't work, we'll just outlaw nuggets.

A Few NFL Updates

It's been a little while since I've written anything, so I'll jump back into the fray with a little NFL talk. Lot of stuff going on, but I suspect we may look back and see it as a lot of action without much impact on the serious contenders. Remember the wildness over Albert Haynesworth last year? Exactly.

• At this point we have to assume that the economy has hit the Rust Belt worse than we thought and Cleveland hasn't had electricity or outside communication in the last year or so. That's the only explanation for the hands down worst decision of the NFL offseason, the Browns' gift of a 2-year deal to Jake Delhomme, the biggest meltdown of 2009. Seriously, Bernie Madoff had a better 2009 than Jake Delhomme. How unwanted was Delhomme? The Panthers had signed him to a new contract that they just decided to eat after 1 season, despite the fact that they're paying him $12 mil this year. He was that bad. They're paying him $12 mil to leave town. And what do the Browns do? They hand him another $7 mil for 2010 to throw awful picks to the AFC North. He'll never see the 2011 money, so forget about the second year of the deal. It's amazing, when you think that people get paid a ton of money to make these decisions.
  
• I actually really liked Julius Peppers to the Bears. I don't think they're as far away as you'd think, considering last year's debacle, and if they can shore up that garbage heap of an O-line, they could make a push (they had to bring in Piano-crate sized casket the 1,000 pound guy got buried in to take away Orlando Pace). Tough division though, with the Packers and Vikes overall better clubs. But Peppers gives them a playmaker on the defensive front 7 who can create problems, and that's hard to come by.
  
• The Pats actually did real well by overpaying to keep their key players instead of tossing big money at a scarce free agent market. It makes big news to pay Karlos Dansby $45 million, but was anyone ever scared by the Arizona defense when he was there? Ummm...no. Paying Wilfork 125% of his market value was a good move in an uncapped year, and shows the crew management's on their side. Same thing for Bodden, who's the second best corner in the division.
• Cleveland, be prepared to be let down by Ben Watson. His hands are inconsistent and he doesn't block. But if it comes down to a Tight End 40 meter dash contest, you're in great shape! Nice work you goddamn morons. If one of the best passing offenses in the league can't make much use of him, I'm sure Mangini and Delhomme will fix things. Good use of $12 mil. Maybe next time just pile up $6 mil and just set it on fire. At least then it won't take 3 years to get rid of it.
  
• I don't like the Jets moves as much as everyone else. If Antonio Cromartie is really a stud cornerback, why the hell is San Diego sending him away for a 3rd round pick? And what's with the swap of Thomas Jones for a clearly washed up Ladainian Tomlinson. I understand that Jones is probably on the downside of his career, but how is the best solution to bring in a guy who's not only at the bottom of the hill, but in a ditch at the bottom of the hill.
  
• As for the draft, the Rams just have to take Sam Bradford. They just do. Try to integrate him into games where you can, but realize that this is going to take a couple of years. Actually, following the Detroit plan can work. I like the Lions' big picture plans and they're putting together a solid roster of good players. I love Ndamukong Suh for them at #2, and with a good draft they're an 8-8 team in 2011. If they were in the NFC West, I'd take them to win the Division in 2011. But they're not, so they won't.
  
• I don't like all the talk about safeties going high in the draft. This just never works, even if Kiper and the crew are all in love with Eric Berry. Even if he's a great safety, these guys don't lead crappy teams to the playoffs. I hope the Chiefs don't do it. The Chiefs are my emotional #2 team and I have to root for them. But dammit guys, help me out here. I'm ok with Cincy at 22 or Philly at 24 (even though I sure wouldn't reach for these positions), but a top 10 on a safety is a bad, bad move.
• I like Baltimore getting Anquan Boldin, but he's not the difference between them and the elite. He's essentially a better version of Mason at this point, the other receiver they have, and doesn't do much downfield. I saw some good metrics on him and he's very specific in what he does, mainly the intermediate stuff. I like what they did with Stallworth, assuming his head's on straight after the prison sentence. How troubling is it that we have to factor that into the equation?
  
• Ugh. Buffalo is going to be bad. Bad Bad Bad. Like 2-14 bad. Who are they paying on that team? Is there anyone who would start for more than 50% of the teams in the league? Anyone? Maybe Lee Evans, but even that's pretty iffy.
  
• Ugh. So are the Rams. Like 3-13 bad. Maybe another win, but not much more than that.
  
• I have some concerns about the Giants. They're getting a little older on both lines, which is the clear strength of the team. I don't see any real playmakers right now, unless the 2nd year wideouts like Nicks really kick it to a higher level.
  
• I still like Dallas a lot. They seem to be well positioned to make a solid run, and I'm guessing they put up a 12 win season next year.
• Kind of a big quiet story in the works is the attempted revamping of the Indy offensive line. They bounced starter Ryan Lilja after he had a mediocre game against the Saints, and they're trying to change the unit to become more physical. Sounds good, except that the key to this team is consistency and good pass blocking, so a decline there has a "one step forward, two steps back" feel to it.
• Finally, my early read on the Pats is that they'll be better next year than this season. Remember Brady is a full season removed from his monster knee injury, so he'll be better. The defense should be tougher and faster, but they'll need to figure out how to get a little more punch in the receivers if Welker isn't ready. I like Tate and Edelman to step up, although I'd like a receiving tight end like Greg Olsen (Bears) or Aaron Hernandez out of Florida to lighten the load.
  

OK, that's it for now. Catch y'alls later.

The Time Is Now

"America was not built on fear. America was built on courage, on imagination, and unbeatable determination to do the job at hand."

~Harry S. Truman


Right now the Congressional Democrats and Obama Adminstration stand on the cusp of driving through critical insurance legislation that stands as a major first step in the healthcare overhaul at least a decade overdue. At this juncture the only potential means for passing the legislation will be through a rare but fully legal step known as reconciliation, in which the House would need to pass the Senate bill approved in December (before Scott Brown's win ,when it had 58 Democrats and 2 Independents), and then work out changes that satisfy both the House and Senate. There is some indication that a handful of the House Democrats are going to get antsy, but my guess is that they'll get into line eventually to avoid pissing off literally everyone on their side, especially Barry O.

It's clear that once this becomes a realistic possibility, the Republicans are going to go apeshit claiming that this is some sort of government takeover and the death knell for freedom. Glenn Beck's face might actually melt off "Raiders of the Lost Ark" style (Dear God I hope so. One way or another, there will be tears from that man. Mark it down now--he's going to cry on his show.). The total hardliners will beat their breasts in anger and more than likely, it's going to feed the same sort of Teapartiban acts of terrorism that we saw in the plane attack on the IRS office in Texas (as a side note, how awful is it that people like Rep. Steve King (R-Iowa) are rationalizing this clear-cut act of domestic terrorism and facebook support pages are popping up? He tried to murder over 100 ordinary hardworking citizens and somehow he's a hero to these people.)

Both the public and Congressional Democrats need to man up and get real about what's been happening. No more bullshit, it's time for action.

The GOP has had endless opportunities to offer up possibilities for real change over the last year, and they've done everything possible to flat out sabotage any meaningful progress. Instead of useful cooperation, they've offered us the following concepts: (1) Death Panels (although it did give me my fantasy football squad name); (2) Scrapping everything to start from scratch, when they had nothing new to offer; (3) the whole "this is the end of capitalism" rant; (4) Vilification of happy, functioning places like Canada; and (5) Nearly irrelevant, drop in the bucket solutions like setting caps on malpractice. The problem with this malpractice argument is that it's always been a tiny part of healthcare costs (as in 3%), and is 110% a red herring to distract people from real issues. And even at that, the vast majority money that is going to malpractice is going to completely legitimate victims and litigation costs, not frivolous junk suits, as this great report from the New England Journal of Medicine outlines.

Nope, instead of offering anything useful the GOP has remained hellbent on maintaining their position as health insurance whores to the detriment of the American populace. And for this reason it becomes even more critical that the option of reconciliation be used for the crisis at hand. By this point, the conservatives have made it clear that they had no intent to cooperate on anything substantial the party in power has tried, as denoted by filibustering 80% of his major legislative acts last year. When once the civil and judicious thing to do for the voting public was to vote your position and let the chips fall, they've instead used these rules to prevent any meaningful legislation to even come to a vote. These are historically high numbers, and essentially demonstrate that one party is simply opting to gridlock the Federal government until they can muster enough support for their plans, American people be damned. The worst thing of all for the GOP is that they don't even have any plans for the future. It's simply to prevent the other side from making real differences. The gloves are off at this point, and for better or worse the Democratic majority has to recognize that and respond.

The good news is that we've dealt with terrorists, kidnappers, and extortionists before, so we've seen this story play out. They say they want something, be it a new bill or a duffel bag of unmarked cash, but we all know that won't solve the problem. Are the Somali pirates suddenly going into retirement if you pay them off once? Oh hells no. It's the same here. The Democrats need to respond to political aggression with a similar conviction, and force through what needs to happen. No one's going to care how the bill was passed in 6 months if it gets done. Again, the time for jockeying, the politicking, and the preening is over. The final step starts now.